The Big ‘F’ Word
The “F” word…
The big “F” word…
The big “F” word that is driving the whole world crazy
The “F” word is causing a rift in the very fabric of our society. Yeah, you guessed it right. I’m talking about feminism.
Of course, that’s what I’m talking about, what were you thinking?
Let’s all calm our navs (nerves) before we dive into this writeup, so we don’t end up popping a vein or two. I know some people hate that word and I’m probably going to ruffle some feathers with this write-up.
But then, what can I do? Coronavirus has got me social distancing in the house. So the next best thing is to share my thoughts.
I will share it, even if you don’t want to read it. Just kidding, it would be great if you did. Let’s Think of it as a convergence of intelligent minds.
You are intelligent, aren’t you?
First of all, what does feminism mean in my dictionary?
Please take note of the emphasis of the word “my” in the sentence above. Thank you and God bless.
To me, Feminism means equality for both men and women. According to the words of an author, which I shall now borrow;
“Fairness between genders doesn’t mean that everyone should become the same. The end goal is not for men and women to reach a complete genderless state. It means that men and women should be given the same opportunities to succeed despite their differences”
To me, feminism also means “gender equity” which means fairness of treatment for men and women according to their respective needs”: This may include equal treatment or treatment that is different but which is considered equivalent in terms of rights, benefits, obligations, and opportunities” -United Nations
Okay, enough with all the English I’m been spewing.
Second of all, I’m sure you’re wondering if I would call myself or use the term feminist” on myself.
Yes, I am a feminist.
However, before you jump down my throat as some of you do whenever anything feminism crops up on social media. There are all sorts of feminists. Feminists, Feminazis, Feminists who think men shouldn’t even exist at all, feminists who outrightly hate the male population etcetera. I am a simple feminist who believes in equal rights.
The type of feminist who believes that an executive male should receive the same salary as his female executive Counterpart in the same organization.
The feminist that believes that a smart woman should be heard loud and clear, have her opinions taken just as her male counterpart in an organization without hassles.
The feminist believes that women only need to put in an equal amount of work to occupy a higher position in an organization just like their male counterparts. Without having to work twice or thrice as hard just to prove that she can sit at that table.
The feminist believes that house chores should be shared between both spouses in the household as marriage is a 50–50 partnership where both spouses are equal stakeholders. Especially when she also works a regular 9- 5 Job and gets home just as late as you do.
I know that some people are already quaking in their boots.
“Who. does this one she think she is?”
“This one will not submit to her husband?”
“Feminist ke? okay goan Put on the generator. make sure you change the oil and clean the plug too while you’re at it.
(for your information, I can do it. Just saying)
“Feminist Kwa? Oya climb stool and change bulb and when you’re done, goan carry the bag of rice outside (For your information again, I can very much change the light bulbs in my house. The rice part though, I no fit)
Look what I’m just trying to say is, that I believe in the equality of both sexes. I also believe that each gender has its own role in the society. Men and women are not the same.
They are unique and have the spaces they fit into. However, I’m not talking about archaic. beliefs and practices.
The “women belong in the kitchen” beliefs
The “women should die in the home. because of household chores” beliefs
The “men should work until they die from paying all the bills” belief
The “if i slap a man, he cannot slap me back. Aunty Pliss, If you go around hitting people, expect the same back. Maintain the same energy you used in dishing out the slap.
(Please bear in mind that I in no way condone or advocate men hitting women and vice versa. I’m just saying we should all respect ourselves)
The “women submit to your husband “without the inclusion of the. “men respect your wife” part.
Look, I don’t know if you understand my ramblings. It’s just that I’ve noticed a lot of people don't understand what feminism is about and are not making any effort to understand it in this country.
While. some understand what it is women are fighting for. they are however so set in their ways, used to the patriarchal system that favors them, and is unwilling to change.
They can’t bear to let go of their perceived rights. Your excellency sir, please. take several plastic chairs.
Some can’t believe that we are moving past the age where no one is willing to serve you your food on their head, while simultaneously rubbing your stomach to help the food digest and all the while singing your magnificent praises.
Life is changing every second, don't get left behind. The times when the woman only stayed at home and looked after the household and children are fast becoming a thing of the past. Most households run on dual incomes now.
In the same breath, I don’t understand the men loathing feminists either to be quite honest. I believe men are part of the ecosystem, they are also very important on earth and have their own role to play. there are wonderful men out there and I’ve met quite a number of them. Wonderful men taking great care of their family while being loyal partners in their marriages. Men fighting alongside women every step of the way to reach the pinnacle of gender equality.
So what am I trying to say exactly?
Learn what feminism is about, before you embarrass yourself in your next Twitter rant.
Oh and by the way, of course, you can get the car door for me while I climb into the car. Chivalry isn’t dead.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.
*drops mic*
